didn't deserve to be here but here you are out in the world. >> i don't know. maybe i was lucky. a lot of it was my wife. she kept moving forward. there were times i felt like i couldn't get up and keep going and she would make me, she would carry me emotionally, psychologically, spiritually when i just couldn't take another step and she would keep saying you've got to and she would make me laugh and look at things in a way that wasn't quite as serious. in >> schiraldi, meditation, energy workers and it is medical care, dental care, things like that on death row. putting the energy and to someone they plan on killing.